Remain calm and keep talking

I've just had to sit pretty and act normal and loving and supportive whilst my 16yr old discussed the ways to change her name on passport, birth certificate and driving license. She is clear she doesn't want her name but she's wavering on using her chosen name because she's concerned it will be a red flag on applications cos its a weird name. She's gone through ideas of changing middle name to preferred name, changing first name to something completely different, another male name or maybe one we might have chosen when she was born. She acknowledged our part in choosing names and how it affects us which is why she suggested that, which I thought was sweet. She's balked at the costs so that might be our saving grace. She hates spending money. On one hand I love that she felt able to talk to me. She asked me what her elder sister had done and I told her we didn't know anything about it and she paid for a certificate which she didn't need cos we are in Scotland. She seems prepared to pay for a statutory declaration even though neither of us know what that actually means. I tried so hard to steer her away and suggest it wasn't a good idea to make such a decision so young but she answers I can always change it back. I was a paragon of calm whilst inwardly screaming. 😩 I even told her I wanted to use the name Manny if she had been a boy. Maybe I shouldn't have 😟 she wants access to the Mermaids website on how to change your name 

Why do they always open up to me when I'm alone and I have to deal with it without my husband 😢